I'm 30 years old. I'm lazy. I smoke weed. I live at home. I've worked the same serving job for the last 7 years. I have big, grandiose dreams yet do nothing about them. I just lost my girlfriend of 6 months because of my inability to change and the frustration that has causes me. My best friend since we were 6 told me to practically go fuck myself and blocked me. I'm pretty tired of the direction my life is currently heading.
The ideal version of myself is empowered. doesn't smoke weed. has his own place. is in really good shape. and is actively pursuing his goals and dreams.
But the leap from who I am to that guy feels like I'm standing on the edge of a cliff and anytime I go to jump to the other side, I freeze.
I've had the last 5 years to do whatever the hell I wanted and I did absolutely nothing with the time, except chase women and get brutally shutdown over their rejections. But now it's so habitual, the chase- the rush of contact- the wallowing in rejection-- the doubting of everything I want to do. I really can't let another 5 years go by like this. And even as I write this now, I have that urge to make that leap to put my embarrassing and most ridiculing past behind me, while simultaneously weighing myself down over thoughts of my ex, my best friend, and how in the hell I ended up in this spot
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from Things that motivate you http://bit.ly/2JDbtVu
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