Long story short I took a solo trip to Portugal last September and it really pushed me out of my comfort zone. I was uncomfortable with being alone, and realized how encasing myself in a bubble of security with friends and family had stunted my growth. At the time, I was about 215 lbs, 26, and living at home with my parents.
That trip helped me realize that if I wanted to truly change, I’d have to get used to being uncomfortable, and that I’d have to focus on every day as a victory as opposed to the end goal (Ie fall in love with the journey).
I came home, moved out and happy to report in the half year since, I’ve lost 60 lbs, currently weigh 155, about 30 from my goal weight. I live on my own, in a flat I decorated myself. Ive developed a classy wardrobe and love the way I look. I spend tons of time alone, but also do stuff that I want with others, like ballroom dancing and boxing classes. I’m also now a full-time student after nearly 5 years on the job. I’m getting my MS in Engineering.
Now I’m looking forward to starting to date and finding someone to share my life with.
BUT, I deal with a massive amount of self doubt. I feel like I’ll never be beautiful enough, I’ll die alone, I won’t have kids, etc. it never stops and it gets me down.
How do you all deal with that?
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